I'm a loser, and I'm not ashamed.

Let's face it. Stop lying to yourself!

We've all watched the girl put an"L" to her forehead (no interpersonal contact needed), bummed money off our parents or some other well-meaning persons who tried to help us out of the loser traps, or simply lack the so-called "skills" one needs to be a "success" in this world. I've done it, you've done it, and so have many people we all know.

We are the native-born wretched refuse; the ones who didn't fit in, never found a career interest we could make any money at, never got good grades, weren't handsome or athletic, smart or funny. We are to the left of the bell curve: We're the ones who just never could or would amount to much. We knew it, everyone else knew it. We kept eating and breathing, hoping for a miracle. You know what I mean. Maybe some nice girl would see me for who I really am, and love me in spite of my shortcomings. Maybe the boss would see that I'm doing my best, and deserve another chance, and won't fire me this time. Maybe I can win this game if I give 110% and work harder and smile more and shake hands with people in a more charming way.
Winners never quit, right? We're all just a smile and a shoeshine away from "success."

I'm defining "success" as having amassed a fortune (of some scale) from your interactions with the world at large. You might define it differently, and that is your right. Being a great mom or dad, a good friend, a caring volunteer, etc., are all things that make you and others feel like living another day, but I'm drawing the line at measurable success. In the US, that means you have some money, and can buy what it can get you and yours. No money, no honey. Ask anybody.

Well, I've been labeled a loser all my life. Am I tired of it? Of course! I've been beaten, embarrassed, and made fun of for being such a loser POS, the only question remaining is why do I bother to exist at all?

Ask yourself that, too. Why the hell don't you just end this miserable existence right now? If anything, you could succeed at that. It would take you longer and might require more effort than a "winner" would need, but you're a loser, right? If you want to die, you'll find a way.

I've been a loser for 40+ years now, and I think I have some insight into why I never thought that dying would solve anything on a personal level. I'm a living thing. A loser, yes, but being alive lets me do things that occasionally give me joy.

Drink. Drugs. Sex (or, more realistically, masturbation). Junk food, junk TV, junk news, junk jobs, junk applications, resumes, cars, apartments, incomes, acquaintances, connections, manners, politesse, promises, and, of course, there's my self-image lingering back there behind all the other things that make life so unbearable.

I am unattractive. I am incapable of getting or keeping a real job. I don't make a good first impression, or a 1,000th impression, for that matter. Maybe if I could pay some psychologist or join Scientology, or become religious, there might be some answer outside of myself that would give me the key: The "A-ha!" moment that would tell me why I can't rise above my level of not-quite-mediocre, and show me the way.

Fuck that. I've been a loser all my life. Rather than thinking I'll win the lotto, or suddenly become handsome and charming, or become inspired to write a great book or paint a masterpiece, I'll instead accept that I'm a loser and go from there.

This is not a blog for losers hoping to be winners. You will not become a successful person hanging around here. Get lost.

We are not a new breed, but definitely the most common. In the US, only one in eight suffer from hunger. That's really good. Really. Losers outnumber "winners" 100,000 to 1, if not more, in the whole world.

This is not a joke blog. I'm here to discuss what losers can do to justify, accept, and make tolerable their existences. We're here to share survival strategies in this world where most people don't own their own farms free and clear, weren't born to billionaire parents, aren't pretty or cute or handsome or have an honest face, and, if they had a chance to become literate and great thinkers, didn't have all the ingredients for that recipe, either.

Some of us are dumb. Some more of us are ugly to look at. Some of us weren't raised well at all, and never overcame it in time to become "successful." Some of us had all the support and encouragement we needed, but still became losers. Some of us may have been capable of great things, but reality got in the way, and we became losers, one way or another.

Whatever "potential" we may have had is thoroughly squandered. We live on unhealthy food, toxic air, and a planet that won't support a whole lot more of us. I never thought that by working as well as I'm trying to work, I'd be this poor at this age.

Before you dismiss this losers' blog and forum, consider that many people, far more innocent than you, have likewise been unable to even scrape by. People starve to death and die of easily-treated illnesses, every day, in 2009. Dare I mention who dies in wars?

I'm tired of being a loser, but I'll always be one. Rather than try to "win," whatever that is, I instead accept my loserhood. NO person in the USA will ever see me as anything else.

No house, car, decent food, night on the town with a "date." That's over with, or, more likely, wasn't going to happen. I'm a loser. It's ok to be a loser. I'll most likely be breathing tomorrow, and I'll still be a loser. There's nothing I can do to change that, and it doesn't seem like I need to.

I'm a loser, and I'm not alone. With all that's happening now, even Americans are struggling to get by. I'm not talking about all of them. Some are smart, adaptable, have "people skills," or something like that, that means they will land on their feet, and go on with a fairly sustainable middle-class existence.

I'm talking about losers. Real losers.

I started this blog to give a forum to all the losers out there to have a place to not only be losers, but to gain some encouragement in sustaining their loserhood. I was raised to believe that if I did my best, I'd be able to have a sort of life. That never happened. I lost on that deal. It doesn't matter if that was a possible reality or not. I lost, and I'm a loser.

Instead of always wondering what I've done wrong, or blaming society or the government for my being a loser, I've decided to just accept the fact that once I'm "retired," I won't be living indoors or doing any better as an old, homeless man with no friends or support. I accept my role and my fate. I'm a living thing, as subject to whatever kills me as any billionaire. So far, they die, too, though not as badly, as a rule.

In the meantime, I want to breathe, and not be hungry that often. That's a good goal, and, with your help, I hope to die from something other than starvation or exposure.

Let's work on that. Losers, reviled as we are, aren't being rounded up and put in prisons simply because we're losers. We're kinda like gay people (and I'm sure there are gay losers, too). Some people will never accept you, and you just have to go from there.

I'm not ashamed of being a loser. I'm a loser, and if you don't like it, go hang with the winners. They control me, but they don't own me.